Great discription in the begining. While a little short, if you expand on tyhe imagry you provided in the first sentece it could be a great lead!-soph
Just elaborate more on the descriptive part and you're all set! (:~Jiyoon
you should make it longer. If the lead is too short, it's not going to encourage people to read more. extend and elaborate.~DaPurpleNinja
This is quite compelling. Try writing more about the stage scene to draw the suckers...readers in.
Great discription in the begining. While a little short, if you expand on tyhe imagry you provided in the first sentece it could be a great lead!
ReplyDelete-soph
Just elaborate more on the descriptive part and you're all set! (:
ReplyDelete~Jiyoon
you should make it longer. If the lead is too short, it's not going to encourage people to read more. extend and elaborate.
ReplyDelete~DaPurpleNinja
This is quite compelling. Try writing more about the stage scene to draw the suckers...readers in.
ReplyDelete