Descriptive:
A young boy, maybe about 15, walks down the street. He’s wearing a hoodie and over-sized jeans. Out of his pocket dangles long white wires, ending in his ears. Even from afar, you can hear the beat of the heavy metal he’s listening to. This boy will be one of the 5 million young people to experience early hearing loss.
Contrast and Compare:
It’s 1970. Stevie Wonder’s Live album has just been released. If you can get your hands on a record player, you’ll find that the dynamics are amazing. The volume rises and falls at exactly the right moments, and the bass is clearly audible. Now fast forward to 2011, with Lady Gaga’s Edge of Glory. The beat gets you on your feet, but you find that there isn’t any dynamic but loud, and you have trouble hearing the back beat. This is the tragedy of the loudness war.
Direct Address Lead:
Your pumping up your favorite tunes, swaying slightly to the beat as you do your homework. The vocals are great, but your having trouble hearing the back beat. You crank it up a little more. What you don’t know is that this is that you are developing tinnitus. This means that your ears are becoming unresponsive to certain frequencies, and are starting to become sensitive to certain noises. As you increase the volume, this problem becomes worse.
-Haley
I really like the descriptive one:) good job!
ReplyDeleteI like the contrast and compare lead the best because..
ReplyDelete1. you mentioned stevie wonder
2. because of the huge diffence in now and a long time ago, this lead gives a great impact
However, one suggestion would be to explain when you said "the loudness war" because I was kind of confused as to what this was when you mentioned it.
-soph
I like the descriptive one! I think that it's really good and it lets you know what's going on without giving a lot of information right away. Thats what you're really going for in a lead because you want the reader to get interested without telling them a lot of information so that they want to read more. But I thought that all your leads were really good!
ReplyDeleteI didn't really like the first one, the overall effect was too cliche/cheesy. The second one I really liked, but the begining "Its 1970. Stevie Wonder...." was too dramatic and the ending bit about the "Loudness war" was confusing. I think I liked the last one the best because you could relate to it, and it was serious sounding, and something that really could impact you.
ReplyDelete^ I'm Jiyoon by the way...
ReplyDeleteI like the descriptive one, because you didn't know what was coming and then it just hit you. Th solid facts and it left you in kind a wow, did she just say that? I thought it was written very well, but I also liked the last one!
ReplyDeleteThe last one made me rethink about how loudly I listen to my music. Use the third one... use the force...
ReplyDeleteDa Purpleninja
I really like the third one it states an increasing problem that we should handle
ReplyDelete"What you don’t know is that this is that you are developing tinnitus." What? Please reword this sentence and then you're good to go with the third one! ^^
ReplyDelete~SkyeBlue